When will I be able to sleep again???

So many times I want to cry, but I just can’t. At times I wish tears would just roll out of my eyes and nothing could stop them. But then there it stands my image, me as the super strong female who can never be shaken. And by now even I feel that I emerge rock solid in most of the crisis situations I find myself in. And that helps me a lot getting to know something new and special about myself everyday.
Life is surely funny and lovely at the same time. At times I laugh and the very next moment… I love everything about my life. Every step as if is like a hurdle I seem to cross over and stand victorious on this mortal ground.

“PERCHANCE he for whom this bell tolls may be so ill, as that he
knows not it tolls for him; and perchance I may think myself so
much better than I am, as that they who are about me, and see my
state, may have caused it to toll for me, and I know not that.”
[John Donne]

Great things have I encountered lately. Great desire have cropped up in my heart about those days which are still to come. But somehow life is going on, somehow everything is just about fine and I am still alive. :-)


Holy Sonnet III: O Might Those Sighs And Tears Return Again

O might those sighs and tears return again
Into my breast and eyes, which I have spent,
That I might in this holy discontent
Mourn with some fruit, as I have mourned in vain;
In mine Idolatry what showers of rain
Mine eyes did waste! what griefs my heart did rent!
That sufferance was my sin; now I repent;
'Cause I did suffer I must suffer pain.
Th' hydropic drunkard, and night-scouting thief,
The itchy lecher, and self-tickling proud
Have the remembrance of past joys for relief
Of comming ills. To (poor) me is allowed
No ease; for long, yet vehement grief hath been
Th' effect and cause, the punishment and sin. >
[John Donne ]

Time has come for me to say my goodbyes. Soon my route will change, soon the turn will compel me to walk alone once again and yet I am supposed to pretend as if nothing ever happened and that life has been fun living out here with all of you. Though it has made me cry and laugh, I cherish all those moments which made me smile. :-)