No sweet escapes...

Without this and that I was mighty happy
There was no latent desire and no pain, you see.
Since I had learnt the strategy for my survival
Had learnt to keep shut when there was no need.

But when there are those killer headaches

And those pain killers make no efforts or any delays,

I feel like running away from everything

And it gets worse when I realize I have no say.

And then it happens, it was so uncalled for
That I burst out and displayed those feelings inside of me.
This wasn't the way it was supposed to be
This wasn't exactly what I wanted to see in me.


And then all this happened
Making me realize how big a mistake I had committed
All the things I hate revolving around me
And yet I am so quite and so under-rated.


Perhaps that is how my life was meant to be,
To scream and shout and yet be so quite.
The new tasks that I face each day
Remind me that there are no sweet escapes...

Love or curse???

I wish to say a thousand words,


I wish someday the curse would work...


I wish I didn't had to face the love


And yet I wish I was always loved

If you ask me...

If only the world would have known

If only I would have shown

There wouldn't have been any If's anymore

There wouldn't have been a me so alone...

I can still feel it...

As the day passes by
And the night crawls in
I hear us in the corner together
I can feel it in my skin.

When the darkness hides us within
I hear screams, I hear them more
I can see you coming upto me
And hear your name over and over.

I can feel the touch, I do feel it
We are togther as one, I can see it
Nothing can stop me from feeling this feeling with you
The smell of your skin still lingering on me.

I want you irrespective of day or night
I can feel you around me, over and aside
I feel your flesh, I can even feel its pain
I can feel it all, want to feel it again?

**Missing you**

If only you had known my thoughts


You would have known all that I've got


If only you stood right in front of me

You would have been able to see


Just how much I miss your hands in mine


And that sweet smile so divine


Miss you more than mere words could ever express


Miss you more and more, I don't care about the rest!!!

Full of me!!!

I simply hate it when I don’t have good pictures of mine. It seems as if I’m not meant to have good pictures at all. And by the way photography is one of my many hobbies these past few days. I like clicking human figures but somehow my interest isn’t in their faces but the actions they indulge in. Nature is good subject for photography but it seems I have lately lost interest in it. Don’t know why but things aren’t the same anymore. Even I am not the same I guess…

Listening to non-stop music is another of my many hobbies. I can listen to music all day long. Even though my ear drums pain with human voice when strained, it seems so sweet when it strains in a melody. At times I prefer listening out to songs than to others. Somehow the need to listen and to be heard is gone from me. But still at least I listen to someone… strange yet I can understand all of it so very well.

Writing has become another of my hobbies. I agree I’m not a great writer for sure, but it gives me a lot of pleasure these days. I can pen down or even type down my feelings. And what’s best about it is the fact I don’t have to strain my voice anymore to anyone. And I don’t have to worry about the fact that anyone’s listening to what I am saying or not. Cause I don’t want anyone to hear me out anymore. And another benefit about writing, I can listen to music and write things down as and when I feel like and about things I wish. So writing and listening goes side by side for me.

Dancing has been my long time hobby. But these days I don’t dance anymore. The need to dance and express myself is gone somehow. But yes I do miss dancing a lot. It was great back in the good old days when I used to dance every now and then and wouldn’t give a damn to others. I want those days to be back. I want to dance again and this time with someone special, with someone who can move a leg with me and sway into the music. It might sound erotic but it’s my wish to dance with someone very special. I am waiting for that day to happen to me. Hopefully it comes real soon.

Reading was my hobby a few days back. But I have lost interest in reading. Maybe because it gives false hope to my sweet little heart. Realism is required for survival. Romance has to be kept away for a while… there is romance and those special moments too but …. Oh well, let all that be with me ;-)



At present I can’t recall any of my other hobbies. :P :D But for sure it’s great fun to be me… with all the confusions and worthless tensions and crap thoughts… it’s all fun… great fun







Cheers to me!!!!